Inside Our Child’s Mind

Do you ever think about what your ADHD kids must be thinking? We all tend to put words into their mouths – what we wish they were thinking. But the truth is if we ever really listened to what they are trying to say with their eyes, body language, or one or two-word answers, we might be surprised at how wise they are.

Recently, I had a middle-of-the-night inspiration when I gained some clarity about what it must be like to live inside my children’s brains. I am sharing that insight with you here – an imagined letter from all of my kids, all rolled into one voice at every age and stage. Go with me. I think you’ll find it useful.

A Letter From The Mind- What ADHD Kids Think

Dear Mom and Dad,

I’m glad you helped me give a name to all the things that make me feel so different from other kids – ADD, or is it ADHD? I’m trying to understand it, but it seems a little strange. Isn’t this how everyone thinks?

Sometimes it feels so strange to be me. I know you get frustrated with me. I don’t blame you. So do I.

It would be nice if you could try to remember that I’m not doing things on purpose just to make you crazy – at least, most of the time, I’m not. 🙂 A lot of times, when you get annoyed with me, I think it might be because of my ADHD.

• Like when my thoughts are racing, and they go so fast, I can’t seem to capture any of them. They’re there – I promise – but they fly away so quickly. I wish I could remember some of them. That way, when you ask what I think about something, I’d remember what I thought, and not just stare at you.
• Or like when I put something down without noticing, so then I can’t find it when I want it.
• Or when you send me to my room to get my socks, and I get to my room, and see something else and then I forget I was supposed to be getting socks.
• Or when I forget what you taught me and I yell at my sister before I take 3 breaths.
• Or when I act like I didn’t do anything wrong cause I feel so bad about it that I’m too embarrassed to admit it.
• Or when I study for a test, and I think I really know it, and then I get into the test and my mind goes completely blank.
• Or when I forget to turn in my homework (for three weeks!)
• Or when I can’t help saying something that pops into my mind because it’s really funny, before I remember that it’s probably not a good time.
• Or when I don’t stop talking.
• Or when I forget to talk out loud and think that you can hear the thoughts in my head.
• Or when I get an idea and I’m really excited and I can’t help from focusing on it, even though I’m supposed to be doing something else.
• Or when I get really upset and I’m not even sure why, but something just really hurts or feels scary and I can’t explain it.

I know you know more about my ADHD than I do, but I just wanted you to know what it feels like from the inside. It hurts my feelings when you roll your eyes or make sarcastic comments.

But I really like it when you make a joke and pretend its no big deal. THAT helps a lot. And when you tell me when I do something right, I can’t tell you how great that makes me feel.

Cause I hate messing up all the time. I feel bad enough already.

So, as I said, I know that I make you mad and frustrated sometimes.  Me, too. But I hope you know that I’m trying really hard. I really want to be good. But sometimes, I just don’t have as much control as you think I should – or as I wish I did. I’m getting better, though. At least I think I am. Anyway, sometimes I just want to know that you know I’m trying. Does that make sense?

Well, that’s all for now – my ADHD brain from the inside out.

I love you,

Your Loving Child