Ask Your Kids
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Ask Your Kids (Where They Need Your Help)
Sometimes, our kids just “get it” better than we do. Seriously, when we pay attention, they tell us exactly what they need!
My daughter was completing a questionnaire for her HS guidance counselor, and I was struck by her answer to the question, “What kinds of things in school are difficult for you?” She gave me her permission to share her response with you:
“It is really hard for me to start something. For instance, this questionnaire was really hard to get going on. Starting something has so many steps to it. It sets up whatever project you are working on. Starting something holds the majority of anxiety. Starting a test, research project, etc. The beginning sets up the course of the project. The fact that I like doing things right, makes starting really scary.”
True as rain, these are key areas that my daughter struggles – getting started, and perfectionism.
So what's my job in the face of that? My job is to listen, to understand and accept that this is really hard for her, and ultimately, help her learn to manage it. By acknowledging the challenge and dealing with it now, she'll be ready to go off on her own in the world in a few years. Okay, so maybe, an occasional phone call asking her if she's gotten started couldn't hurt!
